"When I am going through a lot and hoping you’ll check on me, you are also going through a lot, waiting for me to check on you."
Gogo_Noma
Thokozani Royals 👑
Life has a way of weighing us down, doesn’t it? Some days, it feels like I am walking under a heavy cloud, hoping someone will check on me- only to realize that those around me might be feeling the same way, silently waiting for me to check on them. That realization hit me hard. It reminded me that while I’m navigating my own struggles, others are also carrying their own burdens, and often, we are all waiting in silence.
The Weight We Carry
I’ve had moments where I felt disconnected, overwhelmed, and unsure of who to turn to. And I’ve also had moments where I assumed others didn’t care, only to later realize they were struggling too. It’s easy to get lost in our own hardships and forget that others are experiencing their own. But what if we met each other halfway? What if, instead of waiting, we reached out first?
This message from Spirit came through so clearly for me:
"When I am going through a lot and hoping you’ll check on me, you are also going through a lot, waiting for me to check on you."
It made me pause. It made me reflect. And it made me want to do things differently.
How I Hope to Meet Others on the Other Side of My “Lot”
I sat with this message, allowing it to settle within me, and I realized that I want to be more intentional about connection. Not just receiving support but also offering it. Not from a place of obligation, but from a place of understanding.
Here’s what I hope to practice:
Choosing Empathy
Every day in consultations, I am reminded that everyone carries something the world does not see. Beneath the surface, there are silent battles, unspoken fears, and emotional burdens that many keep hidden. This awareness has pushed me to be more present, more patient, and more compassionate—whether with family, friends, or strangers.
We often judge too quickly, assuming we understand someone's circumstances based on a single moment or interaction. But what if we chose kindness instead? What if, instead of frustration, we extended grace? A little patience, a small act of kindness, or even a genuine smile can make all the difference to someone who is struggling.
Empathy is not about fixing people’s problems but about acknowledging their feelings and offering support in ways that are meaningful to them. It’s about listening without judgment, showing up in small but significant ways, and allowing space for others to be seen and heard. In a world that often feels chaotic and disconnected, choosing empathy is a conscious effort to nurture understanding and build deeper connections.
So today, I remind myself to slow down, to listen more, and to approach each interaction with an open heart. Because we all carry something unseen, and a little kindness can go a long way.
Reaching Out First (When I Can)
I've decided to stop waiting. Life moves fast, and we often assume people will always be there. But the truth is, a simple message, a check-in, or even a voice note can mean the world to someone. And I want to be that person—when I have the capacity to do so.
This isn’t about overextending myself or chasing people who have made it clear that they don’t value my presence. It’s about reciprocity, about showing up for those who have shown up for me.
There was a time when I thought relationships should always be effortless, that if someone cared, they would reach out just as much as I would. But I’ve learned that life doesn’t always work that way. People get busy, they struggle in silence, and sometimes, they assume their presence isn’t missed. Sometimes, we need to be the ones to bridge the gap.
That being said, boundaries matter. I am not advocating for constantly pouring from an empty cup or ignoring the reality of one-sided relationships. This is about balance—about being intentional with the people who genuinely care, who have shown up in their own ways, even if it wasn't always loud or frequent.
If someone crosses your mind, reach out. If you have the emotional space to check in, do it. If someone has been there for you, remind them that they are seen and appreciated. And when you don't have the energy, rest—because genuine connections thrive when nurtured with authenticity, not obligation.
I will unpack this in more detail another day, but for now, let’s make an effort to connect, to acknowledge, and to appreciate the people who truly matter.
Being Open About My Struggles
I have come to learn that vulnerability creates space for others to be vulnerable too. For so long, I believed that strength meant handling everything on my own, never showing weakness, and always having the answers. But life has shown me otherwise. True strength lies in acknowledging when we are struggling, in opening up about our experiences, and in allowing others to do the same.
I don’t always have it together. I have moments of doubt, exhaustion, and uncertainty. But sharing these moments doesn’t make me weak—it makes me human. I have realized that by speaking openly about my challenges, I not only lighten my own burden but also encourage others to embrace their own truths without shame.
We are all on a journey, navigating different seasons of life. When we are honest about our struggles, we create deeper connections and build communities rooted in understanding, support, and authenticity.
If my openness can inspire even one person to feel less alone, then it is worth it.
Creating Spaces for Support
One of the reasons I started my YouTube community is to cultivate a space where we can check in on each other—not just spiritually but emotionally too.
In a world where so many feel isolated, I wanted to create a platform where we can share our experiences, uplift one another, and have meaningful conversations that go beyond surface-level interactions.
For R99 per month, I am building a safe and supportive space where we can be real with each other, where vulnerability is welcomed, and where no one has to feel alone in their struggles. This is more than just a subscription; it is a commitment to fostering connection, healing, and mutual growth.
Life is challenging, but having a strong support system makes all the difference.
My hope is that through this community, we can continue to hold space for one another, listen without judgment, and remind each other that we are never alone.
Taking Small Steps Together
Sometimes, it’s the little things—a kind word, a shared prayer, or just holding space for someone—that make all the difference. Grand gestures are beautiful, but they are not the only way to show love and support. Small, intentional acts matter just as much, if not more.
I am learning that I don’t have to have all the answers, and I don’t have to do everything at once. Healing, growth, and connection happen in small, meaningful steps. Whether it’s sending an encouraging message, checking in on a friend, or simply being present in someone’s moment of need, these actions contribute to a ripple effect of love and kindness.
Let’s walk this journey together, one small step at a time. Let’s choose to show up for each other in the ways that we can, without pressure or expectation. Because in the end, it is the consistent, genuine efforts that truly leave an impact.
Honoring Our Humanity
As we settle into 2025, I want to commit to showing up—not just for myself but for others too. I want to walk this journey with open hands and an open heart, knowing that none of us are meant to carry our burdens alone.
What about you? Have you ever found yourself waiting for support, only to later realize someone else was waiting for the same from you? How do you navigate these moments? I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments. Your experiences matter just as much as mine.
Thank you for being here. For your presence, your engagement, and your willingness to share. It means more than you know.
I am Gogo_Noma, born to heal through sharing. Spiritual empowerment is my focus. ✨
Until next time, let’s show up for each other in whatever way we can.
THE REMINDER!!!
I am Gogo_Noma and this is Learning with Noma: Your home of Comprehensive Learning and Healing. We are changing our lives one lesson at a time.
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